Sometimes without faint notice, we stumble upon a piece of motivation or hope which is indispensable for that point in time. I’ve been sliding downhill for the past couple of months, and there was no barrier stopping me from my downfall. It wasn’t anything dramatic, like I was some lost soul shooting up under the bridge, but it has led me to this point today– unemployed, planted on my parent’s couch while sipping on coffee. Also, it’s Monday. Anyway, last Friday, I journeyed over to my friend Eric’s house, which is also his parent’s, simply to shoot the shit. We tossed back a few Heinekens, munched on some soggy pizza, and casually watched unentertaining preseason football. He’s also unemployed, and stuck in a similar situation as I am in regards to being submerged with student debt. I mean, it blows-what else is there to say? But, at some point in the night, I singled out the obvious, “Look at us, still at our parent’s homes, unemployed, slugging on shitty beer, and watching shitty football.” It was a sad tale, which is our lives.
Yesterday, I pondered my downfall and how I arrived in this undesired state. And it simply all boiled down to my laziness and lack of action. I didn’t like my previous job, but I should have been developing myself for another more desirable occupation/ lifestyle. On top of that, I yielded to my environment and adopted their beliefs-be practical, “this is the way it is”, etc. Fuck that. Yeah, I may not be in the position I want to be in right now, but it is imperative that I commit myself to improving, and believing someway/how, desirable opportunities to fit my lifestyle will arise. I have experienced it, believe in it, and recognize that the universe will support you in reaching your desires. I must believe in me.