Opening Up

I shuttered my eyes open and reached for my phone on the bedside table. Raindrops were knocking on my windows, but despite the dreary wet weather, I woke up feeling energized. It was 7:10 a.m. and there was a missed called and a text from my former roommate. Did I read that correctly? I thought. I widened my squinting eyes and swiped open the lengthy text. My former roommate from college was opening up about his sexuality to me.

During college, I lived with this roommate for about 2.5 years. His sexuality arose in conversation twice during those years from two separate people, but I always brushed it off as a false reading. Even when I reflect on any other incidents, nothing points directly at him being gay. With that, this news is coming as somewhat of a surprise, but regardless, I’m happy for him.

I reread the text once more. It read: having faith in God to have the courage to be open. Last winter, he informed me about restoring his faith with God. One’s 20’s can be a challenging, depressing period of years and for instance, I submit to faith (the universe) to power me through difficult times. Nevertheless, his reconnection with God served to prepare for him for this day–a day of being open with himself and the rest of the world.

All of us bury insecurities deep within us. We carry these fears most likely since childhood and learn to live with them hidden, without recognizing that they are part of our true identities. In all, we’re actually losing a piece of us, which makes us unique. With that, my former roommate appears different to me now–much more complete.

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